July 5, 2013

July 2

I hitched from Fairbanks to Talkeetna today. Got one ride, from a trucker who was driving his own little car and a friend of his. A good ride. I really like this little town (pop. under 1,000). It’s much warmer and the vegetation is much greener. The trees are bigger, stronger, and more beautiful. (I loved Fairbanks beauty is not the only standard.)

Largest biomass in Alaska: mosquitoes. All the mosquitoes in Alaska form a bigger mass (group, bunch) than all the humans together or all the caribou together, etc.


July 3

I love how Jason Elliot in The Unexpected Light (Travels In Afghanistan; 1999) writes about having lice. So many travel writers slide right over this ubiquitous problem.

I was defeated again (Haiti was the first time) in Fairbanks: I couldn’t handle the mosquitoes. I didn’t even go outdoors for the week or so I was at Amythe’s and Elliot’s houses. Just stayed inside. Hibernated.

Is it possible to have closeness-without-possessiveness? I read something about this, and I think it is a fundamental question. For most people (including me), whenever I have been close to anyone (but especially a man I am having sex with), I (and they) have demanded exclusivity and rules for the relationship. There have been expectations. This sucks!

Skijouring = skiing with dogs pulling you.

The front door at Elliot’s was at least a foot thick and all sides of it were covered with carpet so cold (and mosquitoes) could not get in through the cracks. And no lock on the door at all.

Nick’s brother-in-law and I did a sauna Sunday night. Naked and high on pot, we had fun. Just talking and sitting around in the hot, hot sauna.

Now I’m getting high and feeling very good, here in Talkeetna at Neil’s. Wonderful people in this little tiny town. Talkeetna is a tourist town with an old hippie feel, like Nederland and the old Ojai and North San Juan (Ca.) and other towns I’ve lived in.

I cleaned Neil’s man-cave house a little (kitchen dishes/countertops and toilet/sink), and otherwise, I’m just relaxing here among (new) friends.

Yesterday I bought two tickets:

1.)     United Airlines from Anchorage to Seattle Aug. 5th (at midnight between the 4th and the 5th), and

2.)     Greyhound from Albuquerque to New Orleans Sept. 2.


On Sexuality (from Wikipedia):

The term pansexuality is used interchangeably with bisexuality, and, similarly, people who identify as bisexual may “feel that gender, biological sex, and sexual orientation should not be a focal point in potential [romantic/sexual] relationships”. In one study analyzing sexual identities, described as alternative terms for bisexual or bi-self labels, “[h]alf of all bisexual and bisexual-identified respondents also chose alternative self-labels such as queer, pansexual, pansensual, polyfidelitous, ambisexual, polysexual, or personalized identities such as ‘byke’ or ‘biphilic'”.

Polysexuality is similar to pansexuality in definition, meaning “encompassing more than one sexuality,” but not necessarily encompassing all sexualities. This is distinct from polyamory, which means more than one sexual relationship at the same time.


Scope and cultural aspects: Polysexuality

Polysexuality is distinct from polyamory, the desire to be intimately involved with more than one person at once, or pansexuality, which is attraction to all genders and sexes. Polysexuality encompasses many, but not necessarily all, sexualities.

Polysexuality is a self-identifying term that is somewhat amorphous, as there is a wide variety of different people who use the term to describe themselves. Polysexual identity is related to gender identity and is used by some people who identify outside the binarist gender spectrum. People who refer to themselves as polysexual may be attracted to transgender people, third gender people, two-spirit people, genderqueer people, plus people who are intersex. However, polysexuality does not have to be the exclusive attraction towards non-binary genders/sexes, though it can be. People who identify as polysexual may still be attracted to one or both binary genders/sexes.



July 3

In a recent Supreme Court decision*, Justice Scalia wrote a dissent in which he said, “The Constitution does not forbid the government to enforce traditional moral and sexual norms.”

(The decision was for gay marriage.)


A few days ago, Wendy Davis, a democratic senator, single mother and lawyer from Texas stood up (no sitting, no leaning) stood for twelve hours on the  floor of the Texas Capitol to filibuster  a very conservative abortion bill that the Texas Republicans wanted to push through. She did it.


From An Unexpected Light (by Jason Elliot): James Elroy Flecker (1885-1915), a diplomat to the Middle East, wrote

We travel not for trafficking alone;

By hotter winds our fiery hearts are fanned:

For lust of knowing what should not be known,

We take the Golden Road to Samarkand.


When I don’t take risks, I miss it. Like Dr. Watson in the new BBC “Sherlock Holmes,” I miss the war.


What is Love? What is the Other?

A meeting of minds. Very congenial. Mutual understanding. Complete peace in the Other’s company.

~~from a novel called The Elegance of the Hedgehogs


I am no longer an ugly duckling. I am a Wild Swan.


Another quote from An Unexpected Light:

…what an extraordinary place of liberties the West really is, and how incomprehensible these liberties seem to those bound to harsher and more traditional ways of life. They have become so fundamental to the Western way of life we think of them as “rights”–the rights to choose one’s own livelihood or partner in life, to criticize one’s politicians, to travel abroad at will, free of restraints or obligations–unthinkable in so many other countries. But if the West is a place of privilege, people suffer differently there, too. Exempt from many of the relentless physical and social obligations necessary in a traditional life for survival, they become spoiled and fragile like overbred dogs; neurotic and prone to a host of emotional crises unknown elsewhere.

(Later, Elliot mentions how the West has redefined the relationship between the sexes. Another positive thing about our society.)


More from The Elegance of the Hedgehog:

Beauty in THIS world.

The always in the never.


July 5

When Anya was a baby, Hank and I left her with the parking lot attendant at the basketball arena, and we went in to a basketball game. We were really stupid.

Closeness without possessiveness is a much better idea, I think, than having a “close” relationship (i.e., in a relationship that includes sex) and putting all sorts of boundaries and borders on it.



Say YES to myself.

No depression. Be happy.

I control my thoughts.

Music is #1.

Roll through everything as if it’s normal.

See everything as normal.

Tao te ching: tantra

“Cheat on him in my mind.” ~~from Raising Hope, TV show (Also: flirting is “selling the dream”)

The darkest hour is just before dawn.

The Divine Marriage (from Hinduism)

Don’t fear taking control.

Help others.

Smile. Stay calm.


I made this comment (not yet approved and posted) on a blog called The Female Version of Aspergers”:

We adult Aspies tend to mistrust parents of child Aspies and “experts” who tell us who we are. Now that we have GRASP (Global and Regional Asperger Syndrome Partnerships: online and face-to-face meetings all over the US and in Canada) and other groups run BY AND FOR adult (and teen) Aspies, we have a group-consciousness and we KNOW we are OK just the way we are. This mother (what’s her name?) who wrote “The Female Version of Aspergers” is pretty good, I think. She’s trying to understand someone (her daughter) who sees things much differently than she does. The only problem here is that she sees us Aspies as having many disabilities. And we Aspies see NTs (non-autistics; Neuro-typicals) as having many disabilities.

I contradicted the author’s view that Aspies lack empathy. We may prefer to not voice our empathy. I believe I express empathy in other, non-verbal ways. We certainly don’t LACK empathy. That is a cruel assessment/judgement that is often made by people (NTs or undiagnosed Aspies) who themselves lack empathy FOR US. They certainly misunderstand us.


  • I love travelling alone.
    Solo travel can give you the freedom to meet new people and get to know yourself at the same time. Would you go it alone or do you prefer to travel with friends?
    Solo travel can give you the freedom to meet new people and get to know yourself at the same time. Would you go it alone or do you prefer to travel with friends?

    From Facebook


    Just watched On The Ice (movie). Filmed in Barrow, Alaska.

    As of March 3, 2009, the town’s website wrote of the population: “The largest city in the North Slope Borough, Barrow has 4,429 residents, of which approximately 61% are Iñupiat Eskimo.



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